chasing the sun

I remembered something today…I don’t even know how or why it came into my mind.

I was in 8th grade and sitting in Algebra class, one of four 8th graders in the class. The rest of the students in the class were 9th graders – Freshmen. And, at Bonham Junior High, being a Freshman was about the best thing you could be.

Our teacher, Mr. Ross, was a kind, caring and, I thought, handsome man who made us laugh often and helped me to enjoy Algebra. He had dark hair and dark eyes and his wife was one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen close up.

This particular afternoon, I don’t remember what we were studying, but it was likely something I didn’t understand. We were seated quietly working at our desks. And I was humming or singing softly to myself some song or another and I squeaked out a really high note a little too loudly. If anyone noticed, they never said anything.

Except for Laura

Laura sat behind me in class. She was a Freshman, of course, and she had curly streaked blonde hair and freckles. She was tall, thin, cute and popular – all the things I was NOT – and for some reason she picked that day to start harassing me. The moment I squeaked, she burst into laughter and whispered, “Were you singing?” in that incredulous, you’ve-gotta-be-kidding-me tone that seasoned bully’s use to humiliate their unsuspecting victims.

I don’t remember what I said, if anything, but I remember being savagely embarrassed and self-conscious.

I guess maybe I thought of it because I’m having one of those days where my clothes don’t fit right and my view of the world is skewed because of it. It’s one of those days when I feel like I don’t fit in and I actually care that I don’t.

Bring on the sweater weather!!!!